You don't have to do this

You don't have to stay connected and pathologically loyal to everyone you've ever loved if they are abusive and they won't quit. I know it hurts like hell severing ties with someone you love, but it also hurts like hell being harmed by the same person time and again and convincing yourself it's okay. The sad thing is you may never consciously notice how much it hurts because the pain is so buried, so disguised. You'll just wake up one day feeling like there's nothing left of you and you won't really know why. You might even go to a therapist and they might notice you talk about awful interactions with the same people over and over, and if they ask about the link between any of those people and your depression or your anger or your anxiety, you won't see it. 'Every relationship has problems,' you'll justify. You won't have any idea that not only are those relationships toxic, so were the countless times you threw yourself away to keep the peace. You're not even on your own side at that point.

Hopefully if you find yourself there, you will be given another chance at real care. Some angelic person will stumble across your path and see your pain, maybe even relate personally, and they'll be willing to do practically anything to help you. But then there's a chance your trauma will be so bad and so deeply ingrained you can't see them as they are. You'll reenact your trauma using them as a NPC and you'll push them away too. And then what?

Don't let it happen. Have boundaries, and if people consistently abuse you against them, walk away.

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anonymous Relationships June 27, 2025 at 11:07 am 1 0