I m a failure
I feel like I've been drained of all life and motivation for years. I failed all of my classes this semester and I haven't even paid for them yet. I might not be able to and I already have 80k in loans. My parents think I'm graduating next semester and I don't have the courage to tell them that I fucked up again (this is my 5th year). My roommate is leaving soon and that leaves the other who I'm pretty sure hates me (I don't blame him; I do too). I hate going to bed because every night I fall into a pit of self-pity where my mind swirls with all of my fuck-ups and shortcomings. Sometimes it feels like I can barely breathe. Even worse is that I still feel confusion and shame about my sexuality. And I know all of these things are my fault but I'm too lazy to face myself or my problems. My defining characteristic other than laziness is avoiding help in any form. I don't know why I'm like this. I usually just distract myself with youtube and video games but recently I've only been able to do that for an hour or two before this crushing feeling sets in. It's such a pathetic mess and I literally dream of death but that's probably just because it'd be easier than putting effort into anything.Thanks for letting me vent.
anonymous School November 20, 2018 at 11:44 pm 1 2
2 Confession Comments
well join the club. for every winner out there , there is about at least 1 thousand or more losers.
botywot 7 years ago
botywot 7 years ago
You say that you never had a mum
And nobody needs you
So cry, so cry
You believe that life rolls by
Just to deceive you
By your time, by your time
You're getting old
And the longer you take
The slower your pain will grow
It will grow, it will grow
You can close your eyes
And hope that when you open them
You've got a brand new life
Do you find, you can't hide?
You can give your life
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
Grow up and make the best of what you've got
Of what you've got,
Of what you've got
The days are going by and you're sittin' on your arse
And you're wondering why, why, why, yeah
You can give your life, or
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You say that you never had a mum
And nobody needs you
So cry, so cry, so cry
You believe that life rolls by just to deceive you
By your time, well by your time
Your getting old
And the longer you take the slower you'll pain will grow
It'll grow, it'll grow
You can close your eyes
And hope that when you open them
You've got a brand new life
You can give your life or
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Well look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
Don't, don't, don't, don't you do it
anonymous 7 years ago
And nobody needs you
So cry, so cry
You believe that life rolls by
Just to deceive you
By your time, by your time
You're getting old
And the longer you take
The slower your pain will grow
It will grow, it will grow
You can close your eyes
And hope that when you open them
You've got a brand new life
Do you find, you can't hide?
You can give your life
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
Grow up and make the best of what you've got
Of what you've got,
Of what you've got
The days are going by and you're sittin' on your arse
And you're wondering why, why, why, yeah
You can give your life, or
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You say that you never had a mum
And nobody needs you
So cry, so cry, so cry
You believe that life rolls by just to deceive you
By your time, well by your time
Your getting old
And the longer you take the slower you'll pain will grow
It'll grow, it'll grow
You can close your eyes
And hope that when you open them
You've got a brand new life
You can give your life or
You can lose your soul
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
You can bang your head
Or you can drown in a hole
Nothing lasts forever
But you can try
Well look around you
Everyone you see
Everyone you know
Is going to shine
Don't, don't, don't, don't you do it
anonymous 7 years ago
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