Fake friends

I finally opened my eyes and realized how much they downgrade me, underestimate me, exclude me, make me feel like shit and make fun of me. I can't express my feelings. I can't say anything without them thinking I'm joking. Everything that comes out of my mouth is a joke apparently. "As soon as you open your mouth I expect something stupid to come out". Geez, thanks.

I was hanging out with them a few days ago and all they did was exclude me and joke about me. They threw stuff at me. All I wanted to do was to talk to them and have a good time but I couldn't. In such a long time, I just wanted to walk home and cry. Which I did. I was holding back tears when I was with them. As soon as I got home, I let it all out. Which is stupid because I feel like I'm being dramatic and that I can't "take a joke". I can. I can take a joke. I joke a lot. But the kind of "joking" that they do seems different. It feels different.

It hurts so bad when you have been friends with someone for a long time and they just start showing their true selves to you gradually. All the great memories you had with them fade away and are replaced with the memories you have with them now. I realize I have no one. I bottle everything inside. I feel so alone. I have no one.

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anonymous Friends May 25, 2018 at 6:33 pm 3 0