Amsotiredofmylife

i had been forced to transfer to a much better school when i went to high school, i went from waking up being excited to hang out with friends to constantly worrying everyday cause i can't let my grades drop lower than 85, i felt immensely pressured, i began to feel little, i had been able to get high grades before even though i hadn't tried but now, i can't even get a single seal, family problems are also killing me, my dad is kind of abusive, not in a physical way, but he always somehow manages to ruin almost every single important event in our lives, he breaks down easily, gets mad and starts throwing things around even at the smallest things, because of this my mom is always anxious, scared, i think she's also somehow depressed., she's always made comments about how she just wanted to die, and how she wished she never met my dad, my mom tends to break down in front of us a lot and this just pains me because i know that i can't count on anyone completely, i have distanced myself from my family because i want to make them proud again (context: i used to be a really good student, like top of the school joining inter-school competitions) i don't know what happened to me, i can't talk to any of my siblings about this because they'll give me the same reasons about how i'm studying now fro my future, but i can't help but want to life my life differently, i feel really left out, they started making plans without me, watching shows without me, bonding without me, and i get it, i was the one that pushed them away, maybe because i wanted to see if they'll search for me, but there's nothing, i seriously envy people with tight-knit families, i have 3 siblings so you'd think we'd be close right, but no that's definitely wrong, i am super tired, i just want to rest, i have not had a great sleep in months, i'm constantly worrying about something. i have probably like 5 major petas in the text 2 weeks, a heck ton of quizzes, 11 exams, and even more. and here i am writing about how my life is falling apart, should i just kill myself, we have this really strong gin alcohol, it's super accesible, do u guys think i'd die if i drink the who;e thing?

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ObnoxiousRat School January 10, 2026 at 10:30 am 0 0