I hate the fact that I cannot win, I hate the fact that I do not have a plan to win, that I cannot by myself, that I cannot find the way to win on my own, I hate being fucking clueless, I hate losing, I fucking hate that whatever I do I just cannot win damn it. I want to understand it also, how to win, I want to feel what its like to be the winner when you need it, to be at the top when expectations bring you down, when stares and words plummets you, I want to be the best at what I do, I want that all my sufferings and hard work will help me understand how to win, I want to know how to win.
SymonOther June 18, 2025 at 1:48 am30
oh my god symon i feel you. i have been a massive high achiever since elementary. i’m not sure if that made me the person i am today, aside from that, i compare myself like, a lot. just like you, i can never truly win, and i don’t know how to win, but maybe that’s because my standards are so high up in the sky. and to me, it’s a matter of self-worth too. i want to be the best at everything too. a jack of all trades, the pinnacle of skill. but for example, whenever i see someone drawing realism, i break the fuck down, because i can’t do it. i expect the very best from myself, and i expect it FAST, and maybe that’s what’s holding me back. maybe venting to someone’s vent is kinda stupid, but i just wanted to let you know that i totally get where you’re coming from. what 5 hours ago
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what 5 hours ago