i kind of hate my friends

i dont know man…. so, one day my friends just… stopped talking to each other and me (we’re in a group chat) and at first, i was really sad about it….. but then i kind of got used to being alone. i kind of like it now….i prefer being with my thoughts because they’re more predictable and understandable than people and my thoughts cant hurt me, for me, anyway. i feel much better and happier being alone. and suddenly, after like two months or so, we all started kind of talking again… especially me and this one other person… and they want to plan a sleepover. theyve been trying to plan this thing for a while, but ever since we stopped talking, it kind of left my head.. and i thought it left theirs, too… also i, at first, before we all stopped talking, REALLY wanted a sleepover, too. just as much as THEY did.. but now, i really do not want that at all, and i know i don’t want it, deep down. and now it has me thinking…
why do i hate my friends for pretty much no reason?
i wouldn’t say “hate”… its just now i dont feel like we’re really friends anymore… and being with them, surrounded by them again, it feels weird… unusual, even though its only been two months or so… i don’t know

it’s weird stuff because now that i think about it, its always been this way. with every friend group ive been in. like, one day, we could be talking and laughing all together, and the next, we don’t talk for months… and then suddenly we all start talking again, right after i had to literally force myself to like being alone rather than with people, and i end up kind of feeling more aggravated being with these people who were once friends…

its so weird, and i cant really say it anywhere else because i kind of feel like a jerk about it, but since this is all anonymous, or somewhat anonymous, its kind of nice

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anonymous Friends April 05, 2026 at 9:04 pm 0 0