Families

Does anyone else have the following or a similar relationship with their parents?

1. You're the oldest and have always been made to feel like you're the World's largest disappointment.

2. Your younger siblings can do no wrong - even though they have caused your parents 1000 times more trouble than you ever have.

3. You've been forced into a situation you don't need or want to be in by a statement like "well you don't have to do this BUT..." In my mothers parlance and in my life, this has always meant that I can exercise my free will to say no but I will not be allowed to forget it.

Seriously, I want so badly to go Low Contact with my family. I find them smothering and there are aspects of my past I just CANNOT let go of, even though I'm in my 40s. My family make out like some of the stuff I reference when someone does drag it out of me never happened - like I imagined it all. I didn't imagine anything - I've had extensive counselling and CBT to come to terms with what happened and to accept the fact that my experiences will never even be acknowledged, let alone apologised for.

I'm one of these people who will always say "there are people that have had it worse, there are folk who have been through more, others have suffered worse, longer and more traumatic situations than I" but... I've been stuck in a situation now for years that was NEVER meant to be something I was still involved in. I'm getting NOTHING out of it at all and I've had to place my life on hold to do it.

It's like no-one cares.

There have been times, even recently when I have just contemplated ending it all. I am being suffocated... All I really want is to be left alone to live my life and I feel as if I can't because I'm always "needed". I'm trying to maintain my own life and relationships but my family just keep barging in. I've had to turn down career opportunities that I've really wanted, I've had to hold off on moving my life with my partner forward because they always need something. I don't know how much more I can take.

I'm going to call it rant over now. Trying so hard not to take this any further in a physical sense. I really am, but the depression, anxiety and just general feeling of being used over and over again won't go away and is becoming overwhelming.

If they loved me, surely they would at least consider even for a fraction of a second that I need a life too, So I can only assume that they don't.

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anonymous Relationships February 23, 2026 at 6:10 am 0 0